Friday, November 18, 2005

My Tribute To PETA

In PETA's honor, I'm going to eat a whole turkey all by myself for Thanksgiving (not Turkey Day or whatever PC crap is floating out there right now).

Next new thread: Monday, November 28.

I know you all wait in anticipation...

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Democratic Hypocracy

Can you say HYPOCRITES???

Anyone who STILL feels that President Bush mislead us into this war is not only an idiot, but an uneducated one at that.

I'm sick and tired of the ADD syndrome of certain persons of certain political parties who insist on plastering every car, billboard, and blog with "Bush Lied, People Died." Well, if Bush lied then so did others. And don't give me this crap about Bush re-wrote intelligence or what have you.

Do you mean to tell me the other side couldn't figure out the truth in under 8 years??? (Including Clinton's term.) What dolts these people are!

How about we start saying, "Short-term memories equal short-term terms in office?"

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Supine And Patricia

Here's y'all's chance to badmouth me 'till the cows come home.

Supine: Appropriate name, seeing as how you simply lie on your back and take your Liberal medicine like a good lil' boy/girl.

Patricia: Here's your chance to shine! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PROVE TO ME YOU HAVE PROOF THAT I AM A SEXIST! OH, FOR THE LOVE OF GAIA, PATRICIA, I BEG YOU!

Paterno, DeBarry, and Me

What do all three of us have in common? No, we don't all have the same amount of hair atop our heads, nor do we all prefer The Allman Brothers over Lynyrd Skynyrd.

What we DO have in common is that we are correct on the issue of blacks in sports.

Now, some of the moonbeamers over at Irregular Times will yell and scream and spit 'till they're blue in the face that we are racist because of our (as it turns out) correct deductions as to the reason that blacks are more prominent in sports these days. Oh no; these Lefties would rather believe that everyone is equal and all everyone needs to do is hold hands and sing "We Shall Overcome" by a nice campfire while roasting (organic) marshmallows.

Before I give the bad news to the misguided individuals over on the Left (not all, but those of you who felt a sharp tinge of heat spike upward from your stomach to your throat know I am referring to y'all), let me set the scene: What started out as a debate over Syphillis turned into a debate over race and why or why not blacks were more prominent in sports. I asserted that blacks simply had more talent than whites, and the fact that anyone can turn on any football game, basketball game, track meet, etc., and see for themselves that my OBSERVATION IS CORRECT proves my point. The Liberals, as is their protocol, immediately lit the matches and burned me in effigy, with the obligatory "racist" and "ignorant" comments we Conservatives have come to know and loathe.

Before I go any further, let me point out a simple law of physics: For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Taking some liberty with that law, let me put it this way: There is a reason for everything; nothing happens in a vacuum. Whether it be that we eat when we are hungry or we drink water when we are thirsty, there is a reason for every action that happens under the sun. Along those same lines, there is a reason that there are more blacks in sports. And as much as Liberals hate to admit it or even acknowledge it because doing so would bursty their Utopian bubble, the reason is that blacks are more talented. Sure, hard work comes into play; but ask yourself: That engineering student who never studies yet makes a 4.0-- is that due to hard work or natural ability? Another engineering student who busts his butt and studies everyday, yet barely passes-- yeah, you get my point.

What if Newton had simply ignored why the apple fell from the tree? Explain that, Liberals, without using gravity as an explanation. Did the apple fall 'cause it was ready? Did it fall 'cause it didn't know how to fly? Well, some Liberals would have you believe that one of those two reasons is plausible; after all, nothing that doesn't have wings can fly, and a winged creature can't fly until it is biologically ready, right? Therefore (using Liberal logic) the apple either must not have been ready or it simply didn't know how to fly. Just think of the repercussions if Newton had used that logic!

Anyway, here's an article that agrees with my point, Paterno's point, and DeBerry's point-- though the latter will never win the Tact Award anytime soon.


Bay State Banner

Friday, November 11, 2005

This Is Tooo Much Fun...

Okay, like Bill Clinton to an Intern Convention I am drawn to Liberal blogs. I love to argue. Always have.

And recently, I have been posting again on Irregular Times, that asylum for all things Liberal and whacky. (Sorry for the repitiveness.) Yes, I know I swore I would probably never go back and post (it was my post on Friday, April 8, that read: "Was yesterday's post my final post on Irregular Times? Maybe so, maybe not...
That aside, I guess I should spout the ol' cliche: Never Say Never. KISS had the "Farewell" tour-- the Love Gun still has some bullets in the chamber... Ozzy had the "Retirement Sucks" tour-- 'nuff said... And hey, Hell froze over for The Eagles...

Yep, never say never."
See, Peregrin, you incorrectly claimed I said I would never be back. Boohahahahahahaha!

Anyway, one of the more extreme writers, the aforementioned Peregrin Wood, claims that the key to determining morality in a state in America is not the crime rate, nor is it the murder rate (which, I s'pose, falls into the "crime" category). Oh no. It's not even the amount of drug use or the cases of domestic violence. Oh no, my dear reader. It is none of these things.

Brace yourself to be blown away like a john in Vegas after hitting the Jackpot: It's Syphillis.

Yes. Syphillis determines how moral and pure a state is.

According to Wood, Vermont is more desirable 'cause it has less cases of Syphillis than Texas. Yes, folks, never mind that Texas is the 2nd most populous state and Vermont ranks 49th. Never mind that having a larger population ensures a more diverse population, in this case, more "high risk" populations for contracting the disease. Oh no. Facts are mere roadblocks in Peregrin's pursuit of Liberal superiority! According to him and others on the site, population factors are immaterial; they don't count. What counts is that for every 100k people in Vermont, only .2 have Syphillis (.2 of a person... that's creepy!), whereas Texas has 2.6 cases per 100k.

Yes, population numbers and demographics mean nothing when determining the purity of a state, which is why people who want a Porche 911 Turbo often buy a Honoda Civic 4-cylinder, 'cause they're both cars, right? Therefore, they have the same get-up-and-go power, right? And the Civic is usually cheaper both in price for the vehicle and insurance to cover the vehicle.

We might as well say that New York City and Green Bay, WI are similar as far as crime goes 'cause they both have crime right? And, according to these people, size simply doesn't matter. We can compare anything to anything without considering extenuating circumstances and present it as fact, right? Never mind that New York City has 8 million people while Green Bay has around 100,000.

But it gets better...

When I pointed out that blacks have a proportionally higher rate of syphillis according to the CDC report for 2004, I was called a racist. Then, the conversation turned to sports, and I correctly reported that blacks are better at sports and that they have higher participation rates in football, basketball, and track.

To a Liberal, it's racism when you point out facts that contradict their politically correct agenda.

But it doesn't end there...

When I pointed out that Texas has more 'hoods than Vermont, I was also labeled a racist. Why? 'Cause Liberals refuse to acknowledge a couple of facts about the word "'hood'":

1) Rappers commonly refer to where they live/grew up as "the 'hood'." They gave their neighborhood that abbreviated name, I didn't. But when I point that out, I'm racist.

2) Ask anyone who they think of when they here the word 'hood.' Go ahead. Whether that's right or wrong is not the issue, but the Liberals want it to be. The fact is that blacks have disseminated that term so often and with such resonance that it has stuck. It's their "bad," not mine.

And when I point out that because Texas has more blacks (the higher at risk population, remember?) than Vermont and that that is yet another factor why Texas has more cases of syphillis than Vermont, I'm a racist.

Oh, they're argueing mathematical principles and whatnot, but that's utter (slang term for solid waste matter from a bull). You don't need MATH to further your arguement and prove your point when you have COMMON FRIGGIN' SENSE on your side.


Yes, explaining the truth and the reality of life to some Liberals is like giving swimming lessons in Latin to a dead rat from China.

Ooops, is that racist???

Thursday, November 10, 2005

The World According To Liberals

1. It's racist unless it demeans white, heterosexual men.

2. Your money is our money.

3. Disadvantaged populations include everyone EXCEPT the following:
a) heterosexual white males
b) heterosexual white males

4. It's only a lie if a Conservative says it.

5. You can be charged for a crime even if you what you did was not against the law
at the time you committed the act, er, crime.

6. A desk jockey at the CIA is still a covert agent and must be protected at all
costs.

7. Ted Kennedy can swim. It's just the driving over a bridge after a night of
drinking while taking a "date" home he has trouble with.

8. Terrorists are "freedom fighters" and deserve only the coziest of accomodations
if they are captured.

9. Big Tobacco made you smoke those cigarettes that gave you cancer. They forced
you to put those cancer sticks in your mouth, light them up, and smoke them. You
have no willpower, but it's not your fault.

10.Fast-food companies made you supersize your meals and forced you to eat all those
mega-fried foods that made you gravitationally challenged. You have no
willpower, but it's not your fault.

11.Guns kill people but abortions solve an inconvenience or a problem that arises
due to a lapse of judgement.

12.Our soldiers are murdering, torturing rednecks with no mind of their own. But
we support them!

13.The rich are only rich because they stole from the poor and don't pay taxes.
* This only applies to rich Conservatives, not rich Liberals.

14.Mother Nature has been around for billions of years, but she is helpless to man's
destruction arising from pollution from the last 150 years or so.

15.Do as we say, not as we do.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

The Roof, The Roof, The Roof Is On Fire...

It's great to see that France's policy of being nice to Muslims is paying off.

Don't expect us to help your croissant eatin' butts now, France. What comes around really does go around...

Friday, November 04, 2005

Why Most Liberals Are Stoopid

The following exchange took place on Thom "I am a clueless moron on the pitiful Air America" Hartmann and Dick Morris on Hartmann's "radio" show:


Morris: Did he, did he take the documents out of his socks when he told you that?

Hartmann: Come on Dick, uh, do you want me to talk about, uh, hookers with you? Come, come on Dick.

Morris: Okay, well thanks very much for the interview. Bye-bye. (hangs up)



What the hell did hookers have to do witht the discussion? Nothing, that's what. Typical Liberal response: When you see your ship sinking, point out the flaws in the rescue boat.

Let's turn this around. Let's put John Kerry in Morris's place, and Rush Limbaugh in Hartman's place:

Kerry: So you see, I feel that tax cuts for all are fair and I have the perfect plan to administer these cuts.

Limbaugh: So John, what about all that dope you smoked in Vietnam? C'mon, come clean Johnny! You "just said, 'Yeah!', didn't you?


You see, it's playground politics. No wonder most Conservatives can't take Liberals seriously.

It's makes me sad; well, a little giddy that Liberals show their true agenda/colors, but it's still sad to see an "adult" behave like a 5-year-old.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

U.N. Gets Tough

So the United Nations Security Council has passed a resolution demanding Syria stop obstructing an investigation into the assasination of former Lebanese prime minister Rafik Hariri.

Yeah buddy! When I think of tuff guys and gals who mean bizznazz and who don't take no (slang term for poo poo), I think of the U.N., specifically the U.N. Security Council. If you doubt my words, just ask Saddam Hussein... Oh wait. Never mind.

The U.N. is about as effective as a "Just Say No" booth at a Grateful Dead concert.

I can almost hear the Council now: "Syria, if you don't cooperate with us we'll pass ANOTHER RESOLUTION telling you to cooperate with us! And don't think we won't; WE WILL!"

What a joke.

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